Sometimes coming off the rails in life can be a good thing. Although the majority of ramifications of having Mental Health issues is negative there are some good things to come out of having a breakdown. The main thing I’m realising is my out look on life and the world.
I’ve come to realise that for most of my life I’ve had my head buried in the sand, so to speak. Only saw the good in the world, the world was a great place and took people at their word. Now I’ve come to see the world as a horrible place, where everyone is fighting against you. People don’t care about each other or how it makes you feel just as long as they get what they want.
I’ve always been very laid back and ‘submissive’ just letting things happen and trying to adapt, but after November realising that i cant do that. I have to stand up and fight for my little corner of the world. (I don’t want much. lol). I am learning to stand up and fight and realising that sometimes other peoples views of myself don’t matter. I’ve tried so hard to be ‘normal’ and to fit in to life, but now I’ve realised that there is no normal. Normal is me! People can take me as I am or leave me, done with trying to fit in. If people don’t like me I’m not going to bend over backwards to get them to like me.
I’m Also becoming very aware of Politics and world events and how they do affect my life. Before it really never affected me when new laws or economic caps came in or if it did I wasn’t very aware of it. I’m now on benefits and out of work and not capable of working due to my health issues. So I’m now very aware of how politics and world events are now affecting my everyday life. People say its easy to life to live on benefits. I can assure you its not! Money is very tight, struggling to pays bills. When suffering from Depression and anxiety it just adds to the vicious circle.
People will say its a very negative view, but I kind of thing its positive to be able to see the world this way and to find my place in this world. [whohit]Coming-off-the-rails[/whohit]
The world and the majority of the people in it are good, helpful and honest! You always here about the bad things that happen, but what about all the good things. A simple bus journey will see someone help lift a pram or shopping trolley on to the bus, that is an act of a person with a good heart, a little thing but kind and helpful. Allowing someone into a queue when they only have one item, an act of goodness. We all come across the ‘bad’ people and incidents in life but try not to let that colour your life and make you bitter. There are far more good people then bad.
Depression is a horrible thing and part of getting better is learning to focus more on yourself and not letting others impact on that. When you are down you are vulnerable and its a shock to change from the way you were before. Having something to fight for is good, so go for it. Learn when your council has open meetings or sessions you are interested in. Learn how to stand up and find others with the same causes. Yes the world seems like a big bad place, but as said before, not everyone is bad. You may have to hunt to find a snowdrop in the snow, but eventually more and more will come to light. Its the same with acts of kindness, fun and the good times – eventually you will realise “how did I not know this?” Depression is very insular and by looking and occupying yourself outside of this, you healing will continue xxx in the meantime….give them hell!