Coming off the rails….

Sometimes coming off the rails in life can be a good thing. Although the majority of ramifications of having Mental Health issues is negative there are some good things to come out of having a breakdown. The main thing I’m realising is my out look on life and the world.

I’ve come to realise that for most of my life I’ve had my head buried in the sand, so to speak. Only saw the good in the world, the world was a great place and took people at their word. Now I’ve come to see the world as a horrible place, where everyone is fighting against you. People don’t care about each other or how it makes you feel just as long as they get what they want.

I’ve always been very laid back and ‘submissive’ just letting things happen and trying to adapt, but after November realising that i cant do that. I have to stand up and fight for my little corner of the world. (I don’t want much. lol). I am learning to stand up and fight and realising that sometimes other peoples views of myself don’t matter. I’ve tried so hard to be ‘normal’ and to fit in to life, but now I’ve realised that there is no normal. Normal is me! People can take me as I am or leave me, done with trying to fit in. If people don’t like me I’m not going to bend over backwards to get them to like me.

I’m Also becoming very aware of Politics and world events and how they do affect my life. Before it really never affected me when new laws or economic caps came in or if it did I wasn’t very aware of it. I’m now on benefits and out of work and not capable of working due to my health issues. So I’m now very aware of how politics and world events are now affecting my everyday life. People say its easy to life to live on benefits. I can assure you its not! Money is very tight, struggling to pays bills. When suffering from Depression and anxiety it just adds to the vicious circle.

People will say its a very negative view, but I kind of thing its positive to be able to see the world this way and to find my place in this world.  [whohit]Coming-off-the-rails[/whohit]

Off the Rails

Lord Sugar and the Twitter Incident

Well thought I’d write a post of my Twitter Incident I had, Just feel it necessary for me to explain my side. I had no intention of Upsetting or offending anyone, from the levels of abuse and choice words from other people on twitter it seems I have, So my apologises if I did.

Just thought I’d Type this up as it raises awareness of how abuse and hatred affects the lives of other People. Have lost a lot of respect that i had for Lord Sugar. Don’t think he realised or thought of the ramifications of all the abuse and nastiness that follows from people that follow his lead.

Lord Sugar tweeted:

I thought it was quite funny so re-tweeted it. Didn’t notice the spelling of Scotland until Lord Sugar’s Tweet:


Being Dyslexic and knowing how easy it is to do. I replied with:

“It is on Most Keyboards”

No abuse given, just making an observation and actually agreeing with Lord Sugar.

But instead the Response I got was this Tweet from Lord Sugar:


Don’t know what I did to upset or anger Lord Sugar, but was blocked from his profile. After Lord Sugar tweeted the above post, then started the abuse and nastiness from other Twitter users. Having looked at the 10:33pm there are a lot worse comments some swearing and abusing Lord Sugar. So why I got singled out I don’t know. Sent me into a massive panic didn’t know what to do, but thankfully managed to calm myself now.   I’m not to wound up about the abuse, lived with naming call since junior school must just be an easy target, “Water of the back anyway.”  [whohit]Lord Sugar-Twitter[/whohit]


Making Plans…

Making plans when your depressed and have anxiety issues isn’t easy. Its not easy for a number of different reasons. Firstly when I make i never know how my mood or how I’ll be feeling on the day. Normally when i make plans I’m feeling upbeat and confident, So might plan everything thing out only to find when the day comes I’m in no mood for anything other than hiding under the covers in bed.

Plans that i tend make tend to fall apart for one reason or another. Its so depressing having a goal/plan to do things only for it to fall apart. Just re-enforces the Depression. Now days I’m slowly learning to have open plans. i.e. Go Shopping, but wont make a detailed plan, I’ll wait for a day when I’m feeling more confident and then do. That way I’m not beating myself up over. A lot of things that need doing are quick and easy and if I’m on a roll will get quite a few done in a day.

Even simple things that i took for granted become a challenge and a chore in my current state. I am surviving and plodding along though, just wish i could tie things down a bit better, but they’ll come in time i guess.  [whohit]Making-Plans…[/whohit]